3 Reasons Why You Need a 5-Year Plan

Part of adulting is having a game-plan. Sure, not everything in life can be planned, but most things can be. I have seen people here and there who go wherever the wind takes them, and not plan a thing. That works for them. But me on the other hand, I tend to be more strategic about my moves, It’s always best to be prepared, than to be frazzled and miss an opportunity. when there is no need to be. As the saying goes, ”
if you stay ready, you don’t have to get ready.”

  1. You’re not getting any younger!– While this may be a harsh truth, it is a reminder to take advantage of every day you are on this earth. You don’t want life to pass you by  without having accomplished the things that are most important to you. giphy
  2. Execute!- Having a written visual of your goals can be a great reminder and the push you need to get you to what you want. It is very easy to speak things that you want but often, if you don’t have a plan behind those words, they will stay only words. Your dreams can become deferred. Even if you don’t have something planned down to every second, that’s fine. It’s just good to get your ideas down, so you can see them and hold yourself accountable. There are so many wonderful tools available to guide you through your planning, just Google it! Or, if you want to be less informal use any old journal you have and just write!giphy1
    1. Helps with small goals!- Sometimes having a 5-year plan can be intimidating, but making your smalls goals along the way to help you get to the big end goal can helpful. Just view the 5-year plan as your end result and give yourself daily, monthly, and yearly goals. Once you start knocking out those daily and monthly goals it will give you the motivation to keep pushing to your final finish line!


Good luck and happy planning! What are some things you want accomplished in the next 5 years? Let me know in the comments!


Latest Listens


Trip- Jhene Aiko 

Rating: 4 Stars 

Fave Tracks: Never Call Me, Sativa, Psilocybin 

Jhene’s earthy and laid back demeanor really get a chance to shine in her latest project Trip. Her beautiful spirit shines through every track. The album, and especially the cover art have a psychedelic feel. Features include her bae Big Sean, Kurupt, Swae Lee, Brandy and more. Her visual and biography were also released and are very deep and personal. She reveals so much about the death of her brother. This project is well worth the listen. Put it on and just vibe.



Lavender & Velvet- Alina Baraz

Rating: 4 Stars 

Although this is only a single, it is worthy of reconigition. You may be used to Alina’s sexy voice of smooth beats such as they song Make You Feel, and this song is no different. All of her music just makes me want to slow wind (🙃). I will be patiently waiting until she puts out her next full body of work!

What’s on your current playlist? Let me know in the comments!

Fall Watchlist

Fall is in full swing! Red and orange leaves are falling, and the weather is chillier in the mornings. But, the greatest part about this is the new rotation television shows! Here are my Top 5 for this season…


This show is just amazing! I love how they use their air time not only to entertain, but to educate. They address so many taboo topics in a subtle way. Well worth the watch, you will not only learn a thing or two but I guarantee you will laugh more than once!


American Horror Story: Cult

This has quickly become a favorite season of mine. The premise of the show is centered around the 2016 Presidential Election, a true American Horror Story. 


The Deuce

Pimp’s, prostitutes, and New York. Who knew that those few elements could create an amazing show. Set in the late 60’s, early 70’s this show is following a few prostitutes, a bar owner, and a few pimps as they navigate through the very gritty 42nd street of New York.


How to Get Away With Murder 

The twist and turns that come with this show are unparalleled. Be sure to remind yourself to breath as you watch this show! The question of the season is #WhoKilledWes!?



Scandal is finally coming to an end after 7 seasons. It’s a bittersweet occasion. I’m sure our final thoughts and questions will be answered. The biggest question will be if Fitz and Olivia will finally have their happily ever after!?

Whats on your #FallWatchlist? Let me know in the comments!


For the past few years, I have celebrated my birthday with a birthday blog. One year I did a poem, another a list of lessons I’ve learned, but this year I will just write. This past year has been filled with ups & downs. While all the times were not good, I feel like I have finally come into my purpose as a person. There have been a great learning and growing experiences. Sometimes it we tend to be so hard on ourselves about the things that we havent accomplished, we overlook the things that have been accomplished. I am fully guilty of this. When in fact this past year, I have made substantial progress in several areas of my life. I bought a car, mended relationships, got my braces taken off (😁), published a book, changed my grad school program to what I truly love, became more regular with my spirituality, and last but not least become consistent with missashleyanecdotes.com! So far, I have accomplshed all but one of the goals I made for myself for the year, with time to spare! I also became much more aware of why forgiveness is important, and what it really means to cherish the ones you love.  I have even become more appreciative of my own life. There was a time I was so filled with depression that I couldn’t see the good in life or even living another day. Every day of life is truly a blessing, you never know when you leave your house in the morning if you will make it back safe. That being said I am aiming to make my 26th chapter even better! I have marked this next year in my life #BecomingFearless. I am on a journey of not only becoming fearless but truly reaching and conquering my dreams!

Cheers🎉 giphy1

Becoming Fearless

Fearless. Who can really say that they are fully fearless? Whether it be phobias of spiders, clowns, car accidents, or even mice, those phobias can be very real and disabling. After watching this weeks episode of the American Horror Story: Cult, my eyes were opened to just how daunting fear can be. In the show, the character Kai Anderson gave a twisted monologue on fear, and how it should be used to make people not only uncomfortable but use it to keep control. Another character in the show is ridden with numerous phobias. So much so they make her hallucinate.

After watching this, I began to examine myself and my fears. I began to think about how my fears have the potential to hold me back. Like many, I have the unfortunate fear of public speaking. I absolutely dread it. Being in grad school brings on unavoidable presentations. Before each presentation for a bout a week I get a lot of anxiety. But, when the time comes to actually start talking a switch clicks and somehow or another I make it through the presentation usually with ease. In the end, I try to reflect and figure out what made me so anxious and fearful.

I have truly been working on this, I do not want to live my life stifled. In the past month alone, I have been interviewed twice, and I am currently starting a new semester filled with none other than…presentations. Instead of giving myself anxiety as I usually do, I am making a conscious effort not to overwork myself and my feelings. Anxiety takes A LOT of energy, and I refuse to give in. I am taking control and no longer giving power to being fearful.

With most fears and anxiety it takes you to finally say that’s enough, no more. Remeber no fear is stupid, and no fear is bigger than you. And now, in the words of Aunttie Maxine, “I’m reclaiming my time.” And here’s to you working toward a fearless lifestyle as well. Cheers!

What are some fears you’ve conquered? Let’s talk about it in the comments!



Latest Listens

Flower Boy-Tyler the Creator

Rating: 4/4

Fave Tracks: Where the Flower Blooms, Glitter, November

I actually loved this album! The beats give me Neptunes early 2000’s vibes. Tyler is known for his somewhat wacky demeanor, but his music has never been wacky. His soulful, sultry beats laced with thought provoking words make him an awesome artist. This album makes me want to hang  on somebody’s patio and just chill.



A$AP Mob- Cozy Tapes Vol. 2

Rating: 4/4

Fave Tracks: RAF, Feels So Good, Frat Rules 

Like any A$AP Mob compilation, they deliver. The features are ridiculous! They have all the hottest artist from Big Sean, Frank Ocean, Quavo and many more. The skits on the album give it a great comic relief.


Detroit (2017)

Rating 3/4

I really wanted to see this movie for two reasons, one, I love historical and biopic movies. The second reason was I had never even heard of the murder at the Algiers Motel, although I am very familiar with the Detroit Riots. This movie though fictionalized in some areas was daunting. The scenes with straight police brutality and the tragic murders were gut-wrenching to watch. It was so unfortunate that the events of 30+ years ago seem to mirror the events of today.


5. Rotimi- Jeep Music Vol. 1 

Rating: 4/4

Fave Tracks: Kitchen Table, Baecation, Right Here 

Who knew Dre from Power could sang!? I was fully shocked and impressed with this collection. Rotimi’s talents reach way beyond acting. He has a smooth, sexy voice. His sexy voice suits his sexy lyrics very well. This is the perfect music for date night with bae😍


Bronzeville: Season 1 Podcast  

Rating: 4/4 

I gave this series a try because I love Larenz Tate. I will admit it took a little getting used to having no visual to go along with the audio, but there was still so much action and drama that I forgo about the visual after a while. This podcast series was created by Larenz Tate and Laurence Fishbourne. The series is set in 1940’s Bronzeville area of Chicago. The main character, Lucky, voice of Larenz Tate is a numbers runner of the infamous criminal Copland family. The family eventually finds themselves in a criminal war. Other star voices you may recognize in the series are Omari Hardwick, Wood Harris, Tika Sumpter, Tracee Ellis Ross, and more. You can find the series on Spotify. I am now patiently waiting for season 2!


What’s on your current playlist? Let’s talk about it in the comments!

So…You Hate Your Job?

I often hear people complaining about their jobs. Trust me, I’ve been there as well. Waking up and traveling to a job that you dread. The only thing that keeps you motivated is the paycheck. Sound familiar? If not, that makes my soul smile, if so, I feel you. It happens. But, that does not mean it has to stay that way, and it certainly does not mean you have to accept that. Here are a few quick tips to help you through.

  1. Start your day with motivation and inspiration!– Whether it be a cup of coffee, blasting your favorite artist on your commute, or even listening to a sermon from your favorite pastor, do things that will pump you up! This will keep you from being drained as soon as you walk in the door. If you can keep your energy high, then it will be harder to get it down. Also take the time to do self-care while you are off the clock. Make sure your mental mindset stays in tact. If you dislike your job, where you spend several hours per week, it can be easier to slip into depression.
  2. Ignore negative coworkers!– I know it’s hard, but you have to tune out the complainers and all negativity, including coworkers. They can easily drain you of your good energy and suck you into the negatvity. Before you know it, you will become a complainer as well. They will make it even harder on you to get through your days especially if you are already struggling. So, try to steer clear of the Negative Nancy’s, and when working directly with them, keep it straight business. Once they start to complain either smile and excuse yourself, or drop a positive word here and there. This will usually make them less likely to complain to you, negative people usually only like other negative people.
  3. Keep moving forward!– Just because you may not like your current job, does not mean you have to stay there forever. You can always job-hunt, and look for opportunities that will better suit you. Although thats hard, you may end up finding your dream job eventually. Even working on yourself and gaining more qualifications to make yourself more marketable, is also an excellent way to help you move onto a position you would enjoy more. 

What are some tips you would give someone who hates their job, let’s talk about it in the comments!